“Don’t do it”
All the signs pointed towards it. The spirits had been rather kind lately with their directions. There could be no explanation for it but it worked. And I followed it blindly. No regrets so far.
It wasn’t always like this. They stopped communicating for several years in the middle when I broke all ties in rage. Never to be seen and forgotten overnight. I stood there looking at it. Trying to understand the sequence of events that must have led to it. Wondering if this was yet another person who had betrayed me or was it a harmless coincidence. That’s all everything ever really is. A coincidence.
“Don’t do it.”
Another sign. This time more apparent and vehement. I had paid the price for ignoring them before and oh god did I pay dearly. But what would have caused this? And what was God’s plan when he took me by the hand and led me straight to it in the first place? Was this some kind of a sick joke? Or were these my demons playing tricks on me again? I couldn’t decide if the origins of this episode were good or evil.
I stood there analysing and figuring out every possible combination of events. Tried to read between the lines. The risk was far greater and doubts descended like a fog in my house of speculations. The risk was just too great. But it could just not be ignored. I mean it was right there. It was tainted with betrayal. Covered in lies and gift wrapped. The outcome would depend on my action. This was one of those moments that changes the trajectory of life permanently. I say again, the risk was too great.
“Don’t do it” ,
this time it was as good as someone telling me to walk away.
And I did. I walked away. The risk was too great.
“Don’t do it”